Though I'm not a Lilian Gish
I can cook a tasty dish.
And even though I'm not Joan Crawford
I've got charms that she ain't offered.
I may not be Clara Bow
But there's a sewing trick I know
And Theda Bara
Can't prepare a
Creme brulee or caramel.
Though I can't say I've the looks
Of mysterious Louise Brooks
You won't be disappointed, not at all!
Alice White may be all right
And Blanche Sweet may be petite
But I'm a real-life doll!
Yes, it's time that I confessed
I am certainly no Mae West
But don't let my lack of glamor cast a pall.
Greta Garbo, she's a star-bo
Mary Pickford, quite a kick-ford
But Anna May Wong, she won't stay long,
And Mabel Normand -- get the doorman!
So stick with me and you'll get over
All of Alla Nazimova
I'm a real-life doll!